I Need Some Advice

Because I totally suck at dealing with women. Ask my ex-wives.

You see there's this middle-aged mom who wants me. You know ... in that way. And I'm like totally not sexually attracted to her. She doesn't have the menopausal fat, where for some reason women become wider than they are tall, it's that she lumbers and has man-hair.

My problem is that she doesn't carry herself like a lady and she wears this hair-helmet on her head. When I picture a POV blow job it's totally faggy. The whole thing just doesn't turn me on. Imagine being chased down by a butch lesbian.

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But then ...

I'm totally starved for female affection. To the point that if she keeps on, I'm going to break and then get my ass in all sorts of problems.

I knew this was going to happen. I wrote about it around November of last year: The first woman that shows any bit of kindness I'm going to lose my mind because the last 6 years have been so hellish.

A kiss, a caress, a murmured word in a not-so-intimate position. Crap, I'm going to totally cave and I know it which means no putting myself in that sort of position. But ...

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She wants something from me I'm not willing to commit to, at the same time I want something from her I'm not willing to commit to. I don't want to hold hands, but I do. I don't want to cook dinner together but I do. I don't want to be a settler, to settle for whatever is available.

I'm not shopping in the bargain bin any more.

Comments

[Tanith]

keep your weiner in you pants and look for something better with a little more class. After all you clean up nice and have some kind of morals dont you?